OSAMA BIN LADEN
So I had to play Bin Laden on stage. I was not too keen on doing this. I wanted to switch it up somehow. I thought this was dangerous ground upon which to tread.
Tim and I were hiding in a cave. My first line:
"I shot my whole wad back in September! I've got nothing now. I'm fucked if they find me!"
And the audience laughed.
"I'm cutting off the beard so they won't recognize me. I've been on the cover of Time and Newsweek. I'm screwed!"
And the audience laughed more.
That's the secret. Play the big bad guy like they want to see him, and you'll be adored for ages to come.
Everything's gonna be all right...