I find myself on the verge of being nonplused about this whole audition thing. No feelings one way or another. Then, every once in a while, I get smacked up the head by a feeling of great excitement, and I start imagining how much fun it's going to be. Then I get smacked up the head by a feeling of great despair and start wondering what I'm going to do to fill that gap in my life.
It's quite annoying, and I wish (as I'm sure everyone else does) that I could stop dwelling on it.